Part 35: Post 10 - Neon
Walter the Chemist - Post 10 - Neon(no Neons were murdered during the making of this post)
Last time we saw Walter, Galuf had just had the most badass death ever and Krile was obviously a bit upset.
Apparently he's not quite gone yet, though.
The Guardian Tree is lending him its power to speak beyond the grave, which is admittedly pretty rad.
This is in no way relevant. At all.
Thank god for dragon lojack.
Right. Time to storm the fortress.
Looks like we were late to the party. Jesus.
Spoilers: You only need to take one step into this big dead-end foyer to trigger this once you walk back.
Right, so let's choose to not believe the illusion. D&D rules work, right? This is FFI all over again?
Galuf's force ghost makes Kelger create a spirit bomb to dispel the illusion.
BEHOLD! MEAT FORT!
Some of the encounters in meat fort are fucking nightmares. This doesn't even touch the horrors that are lurking up on floors 8-10.
Several of the floors have lava on them. This does considerable damage if you walk through it...
Unless you're floating. Or a Geomancer, I guess, but who would willingly be a Geomancer?
Jesus fucking christ. Remember how I said some of the later encounters are goddamned nightmares?
Alright. Time to save up - there's an optional boss that I'm going to fuck with mostly because I hate myself and because Zerky! did it so fuck that, Walter is too.
This isn't conspicuous in the slightest.
Totally normal.
If you tell me this isn't the best game translation in the history of man I'll tell you that you're wrong.
Hi, Gilgamesh!
code:
Gilgamesh (Human, Heavy) HP: 55000 MP: 2000 Vulnerable to Slow. Condition:V00=01{ Display Text: 'Makes me kinda happy... {Hurricane,Fight,FrogSong} Display Text: Gilgamesh: By the way... Display Text: 'Where's that jolly old man? Display Text: Cara: Exdeath... Display Text: Gilgamesh: ... I see... {Time Slip,Fight,Specialty} Display Text: Gilgamesh: ........... {Sonic Wave,Fight,TinySong} Display Text: Gilgamesh: OK, this is Display Text: 'the end of my warm-up! Display Text: 'Gilgamesh Change!! Unhide Monster: Gilgamesh (Morphed) } {Sonic Wave,Fight,TinySong} {Strange Dance,Fight,Specialty} {Flash,Fight,Specialty} {Hurricane,Fight,FrogSong} {Time Slip,Fight,Specialty} {Rocket Punch,Fight,FrogSong} Condition:HP < 42000 & V00=00 & HP Damage{ No Interrupt{ Display Text: Gilgamesh: So... Display Text: 'Let's see... Display Text: 'This is our fourth time, huh... Set V00=01 {Flash,Fight,Specialty} } }
The morphed form has nothing really that we care about - it just continues the cutscene ending to this fight. The biggest objective to get Gilgamesh under 42,000 HP, effectively meaning this fight has 13k HP.
I start by layering the usual - Speed Shake, Goliath Tonic, and some levels from Hero's Cocktails. Then I burst out the granddaddy of Dragon Fang mixes.
Dragon Fang + Maiden's Kiss makes Dragon Kiss. Dragon Kiss is the biggest "you can do WHAT?!" of Mix. What this does? It makes the target a Dragon... and it makes the target Heavy. That's right, that "Heavy" tag that's on lots of the bosses and grants them immunity to destroy effects, gravity effects, maelstrom effects, etc.? This is within Walter's ability to bestow. Dragon Fangs are so profoundly good. In fact, it's time to open another of their potent mixes:
Dragon Fang + Potion (or Hi-Potion) makes Dragon Power. This grants the target +20 Levels. Between that and some Hero's Cocktails, Walter's level is crazy unless Gilgamesh uses Time Slip.
Son of a bitch. At least this is a good reason to bust out another new mix.
Phoenix Down + Holy Water makes Remedy. Remedy is the All-Curative. Specifically, it removes all of the following statuses:
STATUS EFFECT: Stone, Toad, Mini, Poison, Darkness, Aging, Sleep, Paralyze, Charm, Berserk, Mute, Stop, Slow
God damn.
With Walter's level messed up but his HP still sky-high with the Tonic, it's time to change attacking tactics. Another new mix, if you please!
Dragon Fang + Holy Water makes Holy Breath. This does Holy damage equal to the mixer's current HP. When you get aged into irrelevance, the 2800 damage of this is way better than the 900 or so of a Succubus Kiss! It also ignores defense.
Eventually Gilgamesh has had enough of this shit and morphs, revealing EXCALIBUR!!!
Can Walter survive?!
Poor Gilgamesh.
Someone else is tired of his silliness, it seems.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_taA4cS3fc
FINAL LEVEL: no fucking idea (real level: 36)
RECORDED MIXES: 13
DEATHS: 0
Stone cold, man. More people to take revenge for.
We got a worthless sword! It wasn't worth the cost.
Alright, asshole. Long list of crimes to answer for. And I'm here to dispense chemical justice.
Pfft. Let's go, big blue.
It's time.
code:
Exdeath (Heavy) HP: 32768 MP: 32768 Weak to Holy. Immune to Poison. "Vulnerable" to Slow. Condition:HP < 16000{ No Interrupt{ {Fight,Specialty,Nothing} {Fire3,Bolt3,Fight} } No Interrupt{ {Fire3,Fight,Specialty} {Ice 3,Fight,Nothing} } No Interrupt{ {Ice 3,Fight,Nothing} {Bolt3,Fight,Specialty} } } Condition:HP < 7000{ {Meteo,Meteo,Fight} {Fire3,Ice 3,Bolt3} {Fight,Fight,Specialty} } {Fight,Condemn,Condemn} {Dynamo,Dynamo,Specialty} {Gravity 100,Demi,Fight} {Fight,Fight,Specialty} {Earth Shaker,Earth Shaker,Fight} {Flame,Fight,Specialty} {Hurricane,Hurricane,Fight} {Zombie Breath,Zombie Breath,Specialty} {Fight,Bio,Fight} {L3 Flare,L3 Flare,Specialty} React:Physical{ Change Target:? {Dispel,Nothing,Nothing} } React:Magic:Slow{ Haste } React:Magic:Slow2{ Haste }
Holy shit, what a goddamned asshole. He'll counter your attempts to Slow him with Hasting himself, he has fucking DOOM (which is a 30 second timer to death) and he has all sorts of nastiness in his routine. To add insult to injury, Walter is level 36! That means Level 3 Flare is in play! Fuck!
And even worse, while Walter has a way to beat Doom before it's cast, once it's on? That's it. The run is scuttled. Fuuuuuuck.
Eventually (read: after three attempts) I get one where he fights me first. And that seals his death. First things first - become immune to Doom. NOW!
Shields up! Lifeshield is made from Holy Water + Phoenix Down, and gives me immunity to targeted instant death attacks. This includes Doom, instant-death attacks (like Death, but not Level 5 Death), and similar. More defenses are needed, though.
Specifically, Dragon Defenses! Dragon Defense is Dragon Fang + Phoenix Down, and grants Protect, Shell, and Reflect. The Reflect is temporary. The Shell/Protect are forever (unless dispelled).
Beyond this, I layer up Goliath Tonic, Speed Shake, Dragon Kiss, and 2 Dragon Powers. Then I remember - this asshole is weak to Holy. Holy Breath, go!
That's the damage I'm talking about! We can put him down with the quickness with these! And eventually, we do, bypassing most of his scary attacks with the power of science.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrVPkgZk9gM
That's for Galuf and Gilgamesh, fucklord.
FINAL LEVEL: 76 (real level: 36)
RECORDED MIXES: 13
DEATHS: 3 (3 losses to an instant Doom)
Wait what? SHIT!
Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
Next time: Outcomes.